1:15:01 minutes.
That’s how long it took us to do the draft. One hour, fifteen minutes and zero seconds. I don’t know what the previous record was, but whatever it was, it’s broken. That’s incredible. Sure, we only had a slight late start and I believe we had one pause, but we had no meltdowns or disappearing acts and honestly, everyone drafted quick.
The leader, as always, was Jeff Greenblatt, who only used 2:36 for his 15 picks. That’s an average of 10.4 seconds per pick. Griff took the longest, using 12 minutes and three seconds (48 seconds per pick).
Of course, how long one takes to draft isn’t an important question. The only question we have that matters is, who drafted well?
Below are my post-draft recap of every selection. The teams are not ranked, so don’t get too excited if your up top. More will come as the season approaches.
DUDELOVE (MICHAEL)
1. Bijan Robinson – RB, ATL
If the best back in football isn’t Gibbs, it’s Robinson, and Tyler Allgeier is no longer around to steal his red-zone carries. Atlanta’s offense is bad and it won’t matter. He’s elite.
2. Lamar Jackson – QB, BAL
I love me some Lamar. I don’t love Lamar this early. Let’s look at it this way, Mike also took Purdy in round eight. That’s six picks later and Jackson is only projected to outscore Purdy by 16 points per game. That’s eight rushing yards. Anyhow, Lamar is 29, so the question is, how much will he run? He’s a solid thrower, but his value has always comes with his legs.
3. Trey McBride – TE, ARI (Keeper)
Six players have over 180 catches over the last two years. Four are elite wideouts. One is Wan’Dale Robinson for some reason. The other is McBride. He’s the best weapon in the desert. Great keeper.
4. Jonathon Brooks – RB, CAR
As a college football fan, I love Brooks. The dude was a stud for Texas. He’s now finally healthy after two lost years, and he’s barely played an NFL snap. He could be Carolina’s lead back. He could share with Hubbard. He could also be a guy whose knees have already retired. This is a very risky high-ceiling, low floor start for Mike.
5. Terry McLaurin – WR, WAS
Deebo is gone and Diggs has arrived, but Terry is still the most reliably, yet unremarkable, receiver on Washington. Jayden Daniels throws him the ball, he catches most of it, he scores occasionally and ends the year as a mid WR2.
6. Courtland Sutton – WR, DEN
Great pick, no wait… Denver added Jaylen Waddle, which is genuinely bad news for Sutton’s target totals.
7. Jordan Addison – WR, MIN
Minnesota’s quarterback situation is now a three-way argument between McCarthy, Kyler, and chaos. Addison is talented and completely dependent on which of them wins, but he’ll always play second fiddle to Jefferson.
8. Brock Purdy – QB, SF
Purdy has always underrated due to health concerns, by not just him, but his skill players. Drafted as the backup to Lamar Jackson, but honestly, he’s good enough to start, especially depending on the matchup.
9. Blake Corum – RB, LAR
Kyren Williams’ handcuff, although he started getting more touches at the end of last season. If Williams ever goes down, Corum could be an instant star.
10. Brian Thomas Jr. – WR, JAC (Keeper)
I’m not going to lie. I don’t like Brian Thomas. The fact is, he had one breakout six-week period two years ago. Yet, all those games came with the Jags backup QB. Thomas has never developed a rapport with Trevor Lawrence. Without that, Thomas is a WR2 at best.
11. Steelers DST – PIT
They get Cleveland twice a year, so that’s something.
12. Keaton Mitchell – RB, LAC
Signed with the Chargers to back up Omarion Hampton. Fast, tiny, has played about nine meaningful NFL snaps.
13. Chigoziem Okonkwo – TE, WAS
It never hurts to have a backup if Trey McBride gets hurt.
14. Harrison Butker – K, KC
Hopefully his wife is in the kitchen, where she belongs.
15. Tyrone Tracy Jr. – RB, NYG
Behind Cam Skattebo in New York, but he looked decent last year, so he could get some playing time. Still, he has little value unless Skat gets hurt.
CHOKE ME HARDER DADDY TRUMP (MATT)
1. Saquon Barkley – RB, PHI
A tweaked foot/ankle in camp got everyone’s attention and then nothing came of it. He’s still the engine of a great offense, still a workhorse, still a guy who can win you a week by himself. Wise pick.
2. Rashee Rice – WR, KC
Top-eight receiver in most rankings, fully healthy, no suspension hanging over his head, and Mahomes is still the quarterback who will be throwing him the ball. Great pick late in the second.
3. DeVonta Smith – WR, PHI
With A.J. Brown in New England, Smith is finally, unambiguously, Jalen Hurts’ number one. Of course, that might not mean much. New OC Sean Mannion runs a timing-based West Coast scheme that should suit Smith perfectly. The dude has lived in WR2 purgatory for four years; this is the year the door opens.
4. Luther Burden III – WR, CHI
A camp injury has him on every “monitor this” list, which is not what you want from a fourth round receiver. When healthy he’s the explosive element in a very good Bears offense. Risky, but the upside justifies it.
5. David Montgomery – RB, HOU
Freed from the Detroit committee, Monty is the lead back in Houston and will absolutely deliver ten touchdowns. He will also never break a run longer than 22 yards. Having said that, a solid RB2 next to Barkley.
6. Tetairoa McMillan – WR, CAR (Keeper)
He’s a good high-end WR2 kept in the sixth. Year two, the clear alpha in Carolina, and Bryce Young has quietly stopped being a punchline. Too bad Neatock didn’t believe in him, as he’ll be backing up Rice/Smith/Burden. Trade bait for later maybe?
7. Isaiah Likely – TE, NYG
Out of Mark Andrews’ shadow and into a Giants offense that needs a safety valve for a second-year quarterback. This is a solid tight end pick. He won’t be elite, but Neatock doesn’t need him to be. He just needs a serviable tight end.
8. Dak Prescott – QB, DAL
The Jalen Hurts era ends in Neatock land and he decides to go with the Cowboys quarterback? Talk about going to the dark side. Dak had 4,555 yards and 30 touchdowns last year. That’s a top-eight fantasy finish, and the same weapons returning. Getting him in the 8th is how you win in this league… as long as Prescott stays healthy. He might be due for a broken collarbone.
9. George Kittle – TE, SF
And then Matt takes a top-five tight end in the ninth round, after already having Likely. Kittle is 33 and made of glass, but he’s also still one of the best pass-catching tight ends.
10. Quinshon Judkins – RB, CLE (Keeper)
A potential low-end RB1 in round 10, not bad. He owns Cleveland’s backfield and that’s all you can ask of a back. Now the offense is bad, but the touches are guaranteed. Will Matt start him over Montgomery?
11. Eagles DST – PHI
Neatock will now be starting three from the Eagles; Barkley, Smith and the Eagles defense. You know, it’s never too early to trade for Hurts.
12. Romeo Doubs – WR, NE
Signed to New England, where A.J. Brown will probably eat first, second, and third. Doubs is a fine NFL receiver and a bad fantasy asset. Fifth receiver on the roster, with two more to come, so I don’t imagine any world where he sneaks into Matt’s starting lineup unless a whole lot of shit has gone wrong.
13. Jakobi Meyers – WR, JAC
He’s perpetually the least exciting productive receiver in football. He’ll catch 70 balls and score four times and you’ll never once think about starting him.
14. Deebo Samuel – WR, SF
Back in Shanahan’s system, splitting work with Mike Evans, Stribling, and Christian Kirk. Four receivers, one Purdy. That’s a crowded room.
15. Kyler Murray – QB, MIN
Will be cut for a kicker. Sorry, Kyle.
TWO HEADED RUSHIN ATTACK (ROB M)
1. Derrick Henry – RB, BAL
The beast is now somewhere between “future Hall of Famer” and ” artifact,” yet he keeps finishing as a top-10 back. Baltimore still hands him the ball at the goal line, Lamar still keeps the safeties honest, and the tires still have tread.
2. Nico Collins – WR, HOU
Collins is a legitimately great receiver whose entire fantasy career is about availability. Every year he looks like a top-five WR for eleven games and a healthy scratch for four. This is a WR1 late in the second round. Well worth the risk.
3. Malik Nabers – WR, NYG
Coming back from the knee injury and reportedly moving well in camp, which is the good news. The Giants’ offense is now Jaxson Dart’s to run, which is either a genuine step forward or a concussion waiting to happen. Talent-wise he’s a top-10 receiver; situation-wise, hold your breath until we see that Dart and Nabers share a bond.
4. Tyler Warren – TE, IND
Second-year tight ends are where fantasy leagues get won, said no one, but Warren was on the verge of being elite as a rookie before Daniel Jones got hurt. Look for the Colts to feed him because they don’t have many other options. Fine pick, appropriate round, no notes.
5. Jalen Hurts – QB, PHI
For the first time in league history, Jalen Hurts will not be on Neatock’s squad. Thirty-seven rushing touchdowns over three years and a coaching staff that will still Brotherly Shove him into the end zone at every opportunity. He lost A.J. Brown, which could sting, but nobody drafts Hurts for the passing. You draft Hurts because he scores from the one-yard line a ton.
6. Quentin Johnston – WR, LAC
Ah, the annual Quentin Johnston Believe In Me Tour. Herbert still throws him the ball, he still catches roughly some of them, and every October somebody in this league starts him and regrets it. Round six is a fair price for a guy who is backing up Collins and Nabers.
7. Chase Brown – RB, CIN (Keeper)
Round seven for a consensus top-eight running back. This is the kind of keeper that should come with an applause. Brown has the Cincinnati backfield to himself in an offense that scores constantly. A few teams had solid backs or receivers being kept late in the draft, but many still filled up their rosters with early draft picks with guys who play the same position. Not Masterson, who penciled Brown into his starting lineup and never thought twice about it. Of course, also having Bucky later gave Rob some leeway.
8. Caleb Williams – QB, CHI
Year two under Ben Johnson turned Caleb into a top-seven fantasy QB, and he’s the fastest quarterback in the league. Drafting him as your backup to Hurts is almost rude. Maybe this is a trade chip disguised as a bench player. Or Williams could just end up as Rob’s starter.
9. Wan’Dale Robinson – WR, TEN
Seemed like a good move when he left NY via free agency, but Tennessee spent the fourth overall pick on Carnell Tate and still has Calvin Ridley. Wan’Dale is the third mouth at a two-mouth table, but he does have 186 catches over the last two years. Of course, they’re for about 3 yards per reception, so there’s that.
10. Ravens DST – BAL
Bad last year, but if healthy, this unit is decent and exactly what a round ten defense should be. Unfortunately he missed out on the Texans, who were taken four picks ahead of him.
11. Matthew Golden – WR, GB
Year two in Green Bay, where receiver targets are distributed by a random number generator operated by Jordan Love. Golden has the tools, but it’s hard seeing someone breaking out of the pack among all the receivers in the pack.
12. Bucky Irving – RB, TB (Keeper)
Round twelve. A top-12 running back. Again, folks are down on Bucky. They say Tucker is going to get goal line and Gainwell is going to steal a ton of touches, but I’m on team Bucky. I think he gets enough carries to fight for a starting spot in Rob’s starting lineup.
13. Woody Marks – RB, HOU
David Montgomery’s handcuff in round 13. Why not? Monty is 29 and has a running style best described as “car accident.” Smart insurance in a round that’s usually wasted.
14. Michael Pittman – WR, PIT
Traded to Pittsburgh to catch passes from a quarterback who spends more days arguing about Covid than football in the year 2026. He’ll get targets. He’ll get eleven of them and finish with 48 yards.
15. Evan McPherson – K, CIN
High-scoring offense, with a big leg. Correct kicker, correct round, moving on.
THUNDERPANTS (RICH B)
1. Ja’Marr Chase – WR, CIN (Keeper)
Back-to-back 125-catch, 1,400-yard seasons. Second in receptions and yards through five years of any player in NFL history. He is the WR1 and he is a keeper. All good with me.
2. A.J. Brown – WR, NE
Traded to New England, where he’s the unquestioned alpha for Drake Maye. This might be the best possible landing spot for him. If he puts a chip on his shoulder, he could be chasing an All-Robio award.
3. Javonte Williams – RB, DAL
The Cowboys back, while not listed among the elite RBs, is the one back on Rich’s roster he’ll be able to trust in week one. He’s the lead back in an explosive Dallas offense that will be scoring constantly.
4. Bhayshul Tuten – RB, JAC
Travis Etienne went to New Orleans, which opened the door, and then Jacksonville signed Chris Rodriguez to stand in it. Tuten is the better back and should win the job. Hopefully it won’t be a timeshare.
5. Rhamondre Stevenson – RB, NE
Speaking of timeshare, both Patriots back went in the fifth round and Rich took Stevenson first among the pair. The Patriots are good now, which helps, but TreVeyon Henderson needs to be fed too and I believe he’s the better of the two backs.
6. Trevor Lawrence – QB, JAC
Finished as QB4 last season with nine rushing touchdowns and scored more fantasy points per game than anyone in Weeks 10-18. Getting him in round 6 is legitimately great. This is the first time we’ve entered a season and could say Lawrence is a worthy fantasy QB.
7. Broncos DST – DEN
In Calderon’s league, Burrier took the Rams DST and I followed with the Broncos DST. In this league, I took the Rams first and Rich took the Broncos DST second. Great minds think alike?
8. Jordan Mason – RB, MIN
I actually like Mason, although he’s going to be splitting carries to start the season. However, I believe Mason is the better back. The question is, when will the Vikings coaches realize it and let him roll?
9. Rashid Shaheed – WR, SEA
In Seattle now, behind JSN, catching passes from Darnold in an offense that’s projected to throw more. He’s a burner who posts 140 yards or zero.
10. Jayden Reed – WR, GB
Green Bay’s target distribution remains a mystery wrapped in a riddle smothered in confusion. Reed is explosive and completely untrustworthy.
11. Brock Bowers – TE, LV (Keeper)
He’s either a TE1 or TE2 in every ranking. He’s the entire Raiders offense and he’ll see 130 targets if he can stay healthy.
12. Aaron Jones – RB, MIN
Hey look, Burrier got both Vikings backs. Owning both sides of a committee is a strategy, technically, in the same way that betting on both teams is a strategy.
13. Jalen Coker – WR, CAR
Coker has been looking to solidify the WR3 spot in Carolina. If he nails it, then round 13 for a guy with a starting role is a genuinely sharp pick.
14. Tyler Loop – K, BAL
Kicks for a high-scoring offense. That’s all I got.
15. Baker Mayfield – QB, TB
Backup to Lawrence, priced at nothing, and he’s a mid QB who was banged up all last year. Perfectly reasonable last pick.
THE DICK-TATERS (RICH C)
1. De’Von Achane – RB, MIA
Top-five running back and the only relevant skill player left in Miami. Seriously, have they cut everyone? This means volume. It also means eight defenders in the box every week. When he’s healthy he’s electric, but how much electricity can go through a defense that only worries about him?
2. James Cook – RB, BUF (Keeper)
Led the NFL in rushing yards last season. Stud keeper in round two. He’s a top-six back with an elite touchdown rate in the best offense in football.
3. Tee Higgins – WR, CIN
Okay, who is ready for a historic wide receiver run? I know Calderon is. Higgins is still the WR2 behind Ja’Marr Chase, still catching passes from Joe Burrow, still missing three games a year. Mid-level WR2 is roughly the correct price for a guy who’s been the same player for five straight seasons.
4. Davante Adams – WR, LAR
He’s 33 now and playing second fiddle to Puka Nacua in Los Angeles, though Stafford still likes throwing to him in the red zone. But if his touchdowns drop by half, the dude will become a risky start.
5. Christian Watson – WR, GB
Green Bay’s receiver rotation continues to be a mystery, and Watson’s specific gift is being open for exactly two enormous plays a month. Boom or bust who you can’t trust.
6. Carnell Tate – WR, TEN
The fourth overall pick in the NFL draft and the top rookie receiver in the class. He gives Tennessee a true WR1 for the first time in years and had an absurd 85.7% contested-catch rate in college. If Ward can stay off his back, Tate could be worth a start for Calderon.
7. DK Metcalf – WR, PIT
Now I’m starting to see why there were no receivers available to me in the back half of the draft. Calderon takes his fifth straight wideout and this one is big, fast, but drops things and his quarterback is 72 years old. He’ll go for 130 yards twice and disappear for six weeks.
8. Travis Etienne – RB, NO (Keeper)
Signed a $52 million deal to be the Saints featured back with Kamara getting old and currently hurt. I honestly see him as a solid starter, as I think the Saints offense takes a big leap forward in 2026. Unfortunately for him, Calderon didn’t have the same faith and Etienne will only start if Achane or Cook falters.
9. Matthew Stafford – QB, LAR
Finished as QB3 last season while rushing for a grand total of one yard, which is one of the great stat lines in modern football. His back issues are always worth watching, but as a 9th round quarterback he’s terrific. Great pick.
10. Chris Rodriguez Jr. – RB, JAC
Signed to Jacksonville to compete with Tuten. He’s 27, has never rushed for 500 yards, and is best used as a committee piece.
11. Jared Goff – QB, DET
A top-10 QB last year, elite offense, zero rushing. As a QB2 behind Stafford, this is a wise decision. Running the Robio QB draft strategy to perfection. Bravo!
12. Brenton Strange – TE, JAC
Rich waited for a tight end and he paid the price. Strange isn’t tragic, but he’s not sniffing the elites.
13. Juwan Johnson – TE, NO
Clearly Rich will play roto-TE with Stange and this dude. Johnson had a couple of solid games last year, so he could certainly get some playing time in the starting lineup, but it feels like TE will be the biggest weakness on this squad.
14. Jake Bates – K, DET
Strong leg, great offense. Good.
15. Panthers DST – CAR
According to CBS, this is a bottom-10 defense and they get the Bears in week one. Let’s see if they make it to week two.
PREMIER LEAGUE CHAMPIONS (COLBY)
1. Jonathan Taylor – RB, IND (Keeper)
Consensus top-four running back. Expect a heavy volume, goal-line work, and a Colts offense that runs through him. An elite player and a no-brainer decision by Colby.
2. Chris Olave – WR, NO
The Saints have Tyler Shough in season two, plus a rookie in Jordyn Tyson to take some heat off Olave, who is an underrated receiver. His problem has never been talent; it’s been staying on the field and having a quarterback. Both look like issues from the past.
3. Emeka Egbuka – WR, TB
Mike Evans left for San Francisco, and Egbuka’s target totals with Evans off the field last year was 26% of his routes. That’s a lot. He is now the unquestioned WR1 in Tampa. This is my favorite pick in round 3.
4. Jayden Daniels – QB, WAS (Keeper)
Consensus QB4 kept in the fourth round. Dual-threat, high floor, high ceiling, and the kind of quarterback who wins a week by himself. Terrific value.
5. Alec Pierce – WR, IND
Signed a new deal in Indianapolis, then spent camp on the PUP list with an ankle before being activated recently. He averaged only 3 catches a game last year, but a 21.3 yard per average. Maybe he’ll become the top target in Indy this year. Or he’ll get a week seven start and score zero points.
6. Mike Evans – WR, SF
Twelve years in Tampa, and now he’s the top option in San Francisco with Brock Purdy tossing him the ball. He’s 33 and it’s a crowded room, Deebo, Stribling, Kirk, but Evans has made a career out of proving people wrong every September.
7. Dallas Goedert – TE, PHI
Still functional, still touchdown-dependent, still sharing an offense with Saquon and a run-heavy red zone plan.
8. Kyle Monangai – RB, CHI
A very good pick, especially at the top of category two. He’s been carving into Swift’s workload and the Bears’ offense is good now. Still, barring a Swift injury, hard to see Monangai getting many starts ahead of Taylor or Skattebo.
9. Seahawks DST – SEA
The number-one defense in some rankings, drafted in round nine. Defending Super Bowl champions with the personnel intact. Steal.
10. Cam Skattebo – RB, NYG (Keeper)
He’s listed as a mid-level RB2. That seems low. He’s the starting back and the goal-line back for a Giants team that will be in a lot of close games. Excellent keeper with an extra year of eligibility thanks to the red shirt.
11. Malik Willis – QB, MIA
Rushing upside on a bad team, but he’s never going to sniff Colby’s starting lineup.
12. Kaelon Black – RB, SF
Rookie behind McCaffrey. If CMC’s body throws in the towel, Black is suddenly interesting.
13. Jason Myers – K, SEA
The number-one kicker in the rankings, taken in round 13. Be proud, Colby!
14. Tank Bigsby – RB, PHI
The best name in the NFL and Saquon’s handcuff. Neatock might regret letting him slide.
15. Denzel Boston – WR, CLE
Rookie splitting a bad Cleveland passing offense with KC Concepcion. A stash and a prayer.
LAMB CHOPS (ERIC)
1. Omarion Hampton – RB, LAC
He’s a year-two breakout candidate, but the Chargers lost starting center Tyler Biadasz, which is not ideal for a running back. Still, a solid decision. I would have taken him if he had fallen to me in round one.
2. Josh Allen – QB, BUF
I don’t like quarterbacks taken early, unless you have some real RB/WR studs later in the draft. Allen is the consensus QB1 who rushed for 14 touchdowns last year. He is great, but also struggles to deliver the stats on the road, so be aware.
3. Kyren Williams – RB, LAR
Waited one extra round to grab a second back and Williams is a good one. Efficient, boring, gets touchdowns, has never once been fun to watch, but if he holds off Corum, he’ll produce.
4. DJ Moore – WR, BUF
Escaped Chicago and landed with Josh Allen, which is a major upgrade. He also joins a receiver room with Khalil Shakir and Keon Coleman and a quarterback who spreads it around. He has the tools to be an elite WR1 and now he has the quarterback, so we shall see.
5. Zay Flowers – WR, BAL (Keeper)
He’s always been a low-end WR1, so solid keeper, although Baltimore’s offense still funnels through Lamar’s legs and Derrick Henry. Flowers could be great, but he needs more targets.
6. Sam LaPorta – TE, DET
In Detroit’s offense, LaPorta is a tight end with a massively high ceiling, but that 2025 season. Oof.
7. Rico Dowdle – RB, PIT
Signed with Pittsburgh to be their primary back, which he is. Although can he keep Warren off the field. Dowdle is a real mystery. He showed how good he could be last year for a few games, so there is hope he could land in Eric’s starting lineup, but I’m not stupid enough to predict anything.
8. Jacory Croskey-Merritt – RB, WAS
Year two in Washington’s committee. I actually like him, especially with Daniels healthy, but I just don’t know if the Commanders will feed him enough.
9. Jameson Williams – WR, DET (Keeper)
He’s a solid keeper this late in the draft. Yes, he’s explosive, but he’s inconsistent, and permanently second in the target pecking order behind Amon-Ra.
10. Texans DST – HOU
One of the best D’s in 2025. Great pick, especially waiting until round 10. They would have no fallen to him in round 11.
11. Josh Downs – WR, IND
He’s a slot receiver with sticky hands, on a Colts team whose quarterback is coming off a major injury late in the season. He could be the best wideout in Indy, but he could also be cut by week four.
12. Mark Andrews – TE, BAL
Second tight end behind LaPorta. If he’s healthy, he’s decent, but his best days are behind him.
13. C.J. Stroud – QB, HOU
Is Eric becoming a Texans fan? Stroud will be Allen’s backup, but hard to see any kind of breakout season. He had a fantastic rookie campaign, but he’s gotten worse every year since.
14. Cam Little – K, JAC
Big leg and with a team that gets stuck in the red zone.
15. Jonah Coleman – RB, DEN
The Broncos backfield is crowded, but I believe both Dobbins and Harvey have low ceilings. Maybe by playoff time, this guy could have the job. I doubt it, but I like the pick.
REAL MEN PRODUCE PORN (GRIFF)
1. Ashton Jeanty – RB, LV
Year two, and the coaching staff was set to feed him until an ankle sprain in practice knocked his stock. He’ll get volume in a bad offense, which is the Raiders’ entire fantasy proposition. Not my favorite first round pick. First round picks need to be home runs. Does Griff feel like he hit a home run here?
2. Kenneth Walker III – RB, KC (Keeper)
Speaking of home runs, Walker is definitely rounding the bases on one swing. He’s the Super Bowl MVP and he signed a $45 million deal with Kansas City to be Andy Reid’s featured back. The backfield belongs to him, goal line carries belong to him. He has a chance to be an elite first-team All-Robio back.
3. Ladd McConkey – WR, LAC
Herbert’s favorite target, year three, but he’s still only considered a WR2 at best.
4. Rome Odunze – WR, CHI
Year three in a Ben Johnson offense, but can he be consistent and productive. He’s been “about to break out” for two seasons. In fact, “about to break” is the theme of both McConkey and Odunze. Griff needs at least one of them to break this year.
5. TreVeyon Henderson – RB, NE
He suffered a low-ankle sprain in August and there hasn’t been much word on his recovery, which is a problem for a back whose entire value is explosiveness. He’s also splitting with Rhamondre. To me, he’s the much better back, but the Pats don’t seem to care.
6. Patrick Mahomes – QB, KC
Why not. He just signed a half-a-billion dollar contract, but coming off an injury, is he still an elite fantasy QB? Taking him this early feels a round or two early, but Mahomes has lived his life proving people wrong. This pick sorta reminds me of when Griff took Peyton Manning over a decade ago coming off a neck injury. That certainly worked out well.
7. Xavier Worthy – WR, KC
He’s the second best receiver in Kansas City behind Rashee Rice. Fast, occasionally explosive, mostly frustrating.
8. Tucker Kraft – TE, GB (Keeper)
If healthy, he’s a great keep. Love loves throwing to Kraft in Green Bay. If he stays on the field, he will compete with Bower and McBride for the top spot at TE.
9. Michael Wilson – WR, ARI
Harrison has done nothing to prove he’s the top receiver for the Cardinals, so why not use a ninth round pick on Wilson. He’s never going to be elite, but he could be okay. As my wife says after sex, sometimes okay is good enough.
10. Emmett Johnson – RB, KC
Rookie behind Kenneth Walker, who is also on this roster. Griff has always understood the value of having your best player’s handcuff. Zero notes.
11. Vikings DST – MIN
Top-five DST in round 11. Great pick.
12. Brandon Aubrey – K, DAL
The best leg in football. Round 12 is a little early for my taste, but Griff will never lose a game because of his kicker.
13. Cyrus Allen – WR, KC
A fourth Chief. There are 384 receivers that could have been drafted and Griff found one buried in the basement of the depth chart of a team he already owns three players from. Go Chiefs!
14. Tyler Shough – QB, NO
I’m a big fan of Shough. He looked a lot better at the end of the year and he’s heading into 2026 with a healthy receiving core and a better back. I’m not going to predict that he ever starts over Mahomes, but it wouldn’t shock me if he did at some point.
15. Demond Claiborne – RB, MIN
Honestly, I have no clue who this dude is.
CANKLES McTACO TITS (DON)
1. Jahmyr Gibbs – RB, DET (Keeper)
The best player in fantasy football, according to most. Montgomery’s gone to Houston, the Lions’ offense projects as a top-five scoring unit, and Gibbs now has a fresh contract. This is as good as a keeper gets in round one.
2. George Pickens – WR, DAL
Year two in Dallas alongside CeeDee, in an offense that throws constantly. Pickens is a top-10 receiver now, which is a sentence I did not expect to write two years ago. Great pick if he can get his yardage up, despite having a healthy Lamb on the other side.
3. Jaylen Waddle – WR, DEN
Escaped the Miami rebuild and landed with Bo Nix in a real offense. Everything I read has him flagged as a WR2 with legitimate upside. This is the best possible outcome for a guy whose career was drowning in South Beach.
4. D’Andre Swift – RB, CHI
Still the lead back in Chicago that is now genuinely good, though Kyle Monangai keeps eating into the workload. A decent RB2 in round four; not exciting, but good enough.
5. Marvin Harrison Jr. – WR, ARI
Year three, and the “genetically pre-qualified for greatness” argument has now been tested twice and returned with negative results. Arizona also just spent the third pick on a running back, which tells you what they think of their passing game.
6. Tony Pollard – RB, TEN
Chasing his fifth straight thousand-yard rushing season, which is impressive and completely unsexy fact. He splits with Tyjae Spears, he doesn’t score enough, but he’s a solid backup running back in fantasy.
7. Travis Kelce – TE, KC
He’s still catching passes from Mahomes, which means he’s still relevant, but he’s not catching a lot. His days as an All-Robio candidate are over.
8. Bo Nix – QB, DEN (Keeper)
He’s a mid-quarterback, kept in round 8, throwing to Waddle who is also on Don’s roster. Someone is now a Broncos fan.
9. Stefon Diggs – WR, WAS
Diggs is now 32 and playing his third team in three years. Jayden Daniels is a good quarterback when healthy. This is a “name value in round 9” pick, and round 9 is the correct place for name value.
10. Chuba Hubbard – RB, CAR
Steady, boring, gets touches, especially if Brooks’s ACLs don’t hold up.
11. Jaguars DST – JAC
Is the Jaguars D any good? I actually have no idea and I’m not going to pretend to know.
12. Jordan Love – QB, GB
Always smart to grab a backup arm and Love is a pretty good one. If things click with his receivers and Kraft is healthy, Love could be the smarter start over Nix.
13. Tre Tucker – WR, LV
Fast, occasionally explosive, plays in an offense that’s now running through Kirk Cousins. Bench flier.
14. Eddy Pineiro – K, SF
In a Shanahan offense that stalls in the red zone constantly, that’s actually more field goal attempts than you’d think.
15. Isiah Pacheco – RB, DET
Handcuff time, although this would be a massive drop off in talent if Gibbs goes down.
FOOTBALL? (JEFF)
1. Amon-Ra St. Brown – WR, DET (Keeper)
A solid keeper who plays in one of the best offenses in football. Route-running clinic, elite target share, doesn’t miss games. Nothing to criticize here.
2. Drake London – WR, ATL
He’s the main man in Atlanta, now catching passes from Tua Tagovailoa. That’s… a lateral move at best, but London’s target share is enormous regardless of who’s throwing.
3. Breece Hall – RB, NYJ
He had a groin strain in early August, but the Jets still expect him Week 1. Groin injuries and running backs are a bad combination as they kill acceleration. Big-play upside, real risk, especially in that poor offense.
4. Joe Burrow – QB, CIN
Passed on a second back to get a top-five arm, who throws to Ja’Marr Chase and Tee Higgins. When healthy and behind a functional offensive line, he’s Josh Allen-lite.
5. Parker Washington – WR, JAC
A little early for a sleeper wide receiver, especially in a receiver room with no clear pecking order. But Washington was really great the final month of last season, so this could work out well. I was definitely targeting him in the next round.
6. Jaylen Warren – RB, PIT
Pittsburgh signed Rico Dowdle to a two-year deal to be the primary back, which is bad news for a guy whose entire career has been waiting for the timeshare to end. It never ends. It’s Pittsburgh.
7. Chris Godwin – WR, TB
With Mike Evans gone, Godwin should see a real volume bump alongside Egbuka. He’s also 30 and coming off a serious injury.
8. RJ Harvey – RB, DEN
Year two in a three-man Denver backfield with Dobbins and rookie Jonah Coleman. Somebody’s going to emerge. It could be him, but I’m not betting on it.
9. Harold Fannin Jr. – TE, CLE (Keeper)
A top-five TE in the ninth round. He was a target monster as a rookie and Cleveland has almost nobody else to throw to. Solid keeper.
10. Jaxson Dart – QB, NYG
He’s got that rushing upside, and the Giants added first-round tackle Francis Mauigoa to protect him. The concussion history is a real concern, but as a backup behind Burrow, this is smart insurance for a guy who gets hurt.
11. Patriots DST – NE
Top-10 unit on a team that’s now good. Solid.
12. Dalton Kincaid – TE, BUF
He’s a low end TE1, playing behind Fannin. Redundant, but the Bills score a lot.
13. Khalil Shakir – WR, BUF
Buffalo added DJ Moore, which pushes Shakir further down a pecking order he was already losing.
14. Tyjae Spears – RB, TEN
A lifelong backup, now behind Tony Pollard for a second year. Life is hard in handcuffs.
15. Will Reichard – K, MIN
Good kicker, dome, no worries.
SPACE MONKEY MAFIA (BOB)
1. Christian McCaffrey – RB, SF (Keeper)
Top-three running back off a massive workload season. He is also 30 and his injury history is it’s own Wikipedia page. When healthy, he’s a league-winner; the question is the same one it’s been for five years. Will he stay healthy?
2. Justin Jefferson – WR, MIN
Still one of the two best receivers in football on talent, still hostage to whichever quarterback Minnesota trots out. Round two price for a productive wideout is right on the money.
3. Jadarian Price – RB, SEA
Damn you, Bob! I wanted him with the next pick. In the chat room, I said, “watch, he’s going to take Price,” and you did. The rookie back, taken in the first round of the NFL draft, landing in a Seattle backfield that just lost Kenneth Walker to Kansas City. Charbonnet will be back, but Price has a chance to make him an afterthought. Really good pick in round three. Could be a keeper the next two seasons if things work out for him.
4. Garrett Wilson – WR, NYJ
Four straight thousand-yard seasons with a rotating cast of quarterback disasters, and this year he gets Geno Smith coming off a rough Vegas campaign. At some point you stop blaming the quarterback and start admiring his ability to not demand a trade.
5. J.K. Dobbins – RB, DEN
Denver’s backfield is Dobbins, RJ Harvey, and rookie Jonah Coleman, which is less a depth chart than a bad hostage movie starring Mel Gibson. He’s been close to 1,000 yards before. He’s also been injured a lot.
6. Justin Herbert – QB, LAC
Top-five fantasy QB in many rankings and the only quarterback on this roster. Herbert’s fine, genuinely fine, but we’ve been waiting a few years now for him to be great. Bob needs him to be great.
7. Kyle Pitts – TE, ATL
It is 2026 and someone in this league drafted Kyle Pitts in the seventh round. Six years of “this is the year.” The Falcons now have Tua Tagovailoa throwing it. I admire the commitment to the bit.
8. Makai Lemon – WR, PHI
The Eagles traded up for him to replace A.J. Brown and he walks into the clear WR2 role opposite DeVonta Smith. Great value in this round and he could prove to be a stud keeper next year. Would Castrone red shirt him?
9. Mike Washington Jr. – RB, LV
He’s a rookie back in Las Vegas behind Ashton Jeanty. If Jeanty’s camp ankle sprain becomes anything, this is suddenly a very relevant human being.
10. Jaxon Smith-Njigba – WR, SEA (Keeper)
The reigning Offensive Player of the Year, who led the NFL with 1,793 receiving yards, kept in the tenth round. Best keeper in the draft and his final run with Bob. I see no reason why he won’t continue to dominate out in Seattle.
11. Chargers DST – LAC
Good unit, right round, nothing to say.
12. Josh Jacobs – RB, GB
Drafted in the 12th because he was placed on the commissioner exempt list with no timeline. He may miss zero games. He may miss twelve. Nobody knows, including, apparently, the Packers.
13. Jordan James – RB, SF
The McCaffrey handcuff, which is genuinely smart given CMC’s medical history, except San Francisco also drafted Kaelon Black, so who is the true handcuff?
14. Cameron Dicker – K, LAC
Dicker the Kicker remains comedic gold and he remains a damn good kicker.
15. Malik Washington – WR, MIA
Miami is rebuilding, Malik Willis is the quarterback, and Achane is the only skill player there worth owning. This is a dart thrown at a wall in another room.
PUKA AND THE JEWS (ROBIO)
1. CeeDee Lamb – WR, DAL
A consensus top-six receiver in an offense that may lead the NFL in scoring. Dak is coming off 4,555 yards and 30 touchdowns and the Cowboys returned basically everyone. Just need to keep Lamb on the field.
2. Puka Nacua – WR, LAR (Keeper)
Led the NFL at 107 receiving yards per game and owns the highest career yards-per-game average in league history. Outside of the game he got hurt in, he did not post a single dud all season. The challenge for him is, will he get suspensed for biting a chick this offseason?
3. Colston Loveland – TE, CHI
Year two, Ben Johnson’s offense, and the TE2 in most rankings. The leap to elite looks real or at least I hope it does.
4. Jeremiyah Love – RB, ARI
I wanted Price here, but Bob snagged him one pick before. So I settled for the third overall pick in the real NFL draft. Arizona is not the dream landing spot, as that O-line is a disaster, but he’ll get a ton of touches, and volume is volume once he returns from his ankle injury.
5. MarShawn Lloyd – RB, GB
Josh Jacobs landed on the commissioner exempt list and Lloyd is reportedly next in line. A guy who has played in one NFL game in two years might now be a starting running back. This pick is either brilliant or will be a sick joke in a month.
6. Rams DST – LAR
Top-five unit, drafted in round 6, although round six is a little early, but it’s hard to ignore how good that D-line can be this season.
7. Tyler Allgeier – RB, ARI
The Jeremiyah Love handcuff, which is smart, as Love recovers from a high ankle sprain.
8. De’Zhaun Stribling – WR, SF
Ricky Pearsall’s season ended with PCL surgery, so Stribling steps into real snaps in Shanahan’s offense. The only question is, do I rely on him as my first wideout off the bench or do I toss a redshirt on him? So many questions.
9. Kenneth Gainwell – RB, TB
A reliable backup running back who actually starts in the NFL was not in my draft cards, so I’ll grab the old man all the experts are calling a potential sleeper. I’m not buying it, as I believe in Bucky, so don’t be surprised if Gainwell is an early cut.
10. KC Concepcion – WR, CLE
First-round rookie receiver on a Cleveland team that also drafted Denzel Boston, which means two rookies are splitting whatever passing offense the Browns can muster. The talent is real. The quarterback talent… not so much.
11. Rachaad White – RB, WAS
The Commanders backfield will most likely be a committee and who doesn’t want to be part of a committee?
12. Zach Charbonnet – RB, SEA
Kenneth Walker is in Kansas City and Seattle drafted Jadarian Price, so Charbonnet is either the veteran stabilizer or the guy who I cut after we learn that he’s just going to be a rookie’s backup.
13. Drake Maye – QB, NE (Keeper)
Stud quarterback being kept in the thirteenth round. In a one-quarterback league with our scoring system, this is the single most valuable transaction on the entire board. Just as long as he avoids the Super Bowl defeat hangover.
14. Ka’imi Fairbairn – K, HOU
Accurate, plays indoors, second best leg in most rankings. Perfect.
15. Sam Darnold – QB, SEA
Throwing to the reigning Offensive Player of the Year on a team that’s expected to pass more after ranking 29th in attempts. As a QB2 behind Drake Maye, this is a luxury item.