Griff is coming off a respectable season. He won eight games and made the playoffs. Hell, just two seasons ago, he went 9-5, earned the No. 2 seed, and finished third in scoring. Two winning records in the last three years is a positive sign… right?
Yeah, it is.
Unfortunately, we have to judge the entire decade, and man, what a fucking decade it’s been for Coomer.
Let’s do a compliment sandwich, except there’s no bread. Just the meat. And the meat is rotten.
Over the last ten seasons, Griff has gone 49-86 (.363). That’s not just the worst winning percentage in the league, it’s in a league of its own. The next-worst mark belongs to Don at .437, and Coomer still trails him by nearly eight percentage points. Throw in the playoffs and it somehow gets uglier: 49-89 (.355), dead last among all twelve franchises.
Honestly, I don’t think I could intentionally set the worst lineup possible every week for ten straight years and end up with a winning percentage that bad.
The scoring has been every bit as ugly. Across 138 games this decade, Griff averaged just 1,254 points per season; the lowest mark in the league. And it isn’t remotely close. Don is next, and Coomer has scored more than 10,000 fewer points than the next-lowest team over the decade. At that point, it’s not bad luck. It’s sustained organizational malpractice.
The standings tell the exact same story. Griff finished 10th or worse seven times: 2016 (10th), 2018 (11th), 2019 (12th), 2020 (10th), 2021 (10th), 2022 (12th), and 2024 (11th). His average finish over the decade is a league-worst 9.0, while his average scoring finish is an even uglier 9.1also dead last.
For perspective, Rich Calderon’s average finish during that same span is 3.7. On average, Griff finished more than five places behind him every single season for an entire decade.
The low point came in 2022. He stumbled to a 3-11 record, scored a career-low 1,057 points, and finished dead last in both the standings and scoring. It was the rare season where every possible metric pointed in exactly the same depressing direction.
Despite all that, Griff did sneak into the playoffs three times: 2017, 2023, and 2025. Unfortunately, each trip ended the exact same way—a first-round exit. He finished the decade 0-3 in the postseason and lost those games by an average of roughly 650 points.
In 2017, as the No. 7 seed, Neatock steamrolled him 2,128-1,444.
In 2023, Griff finally looked like a legitimate contender. He went 9-5, earned the No. 2 seed, and posted the third-highest scoring season of his career, only to get bounced immediately by Matt again, 1,643-1,355.
Then came 2025. As the No. 5 seed, Griff somehow managed just 890 points in a playoff game and got absolutely buried by Don, 1,867-890. Calling that a no-show would be generous.
So that’s the decade.
Three playoff appearances. Zero playoff wins. The league’s worst winning percentage by a mile. The league’s fewest points. The league’s worst average finish. The league’s worst average scoring finish.
Coomer went from a franchise with championships and Finals appearances to the team everyone hopes shows up on their schedule twice.
Bottom of the standings. Bottom of the win column. Bottom of the points column.
If they handed out a trophy for the worst decade in league history, Griff wouldn’t have to draft it, it already has his name engraved on it.